Id have a heart to heart with the 10 year old. they are sometimes smarter than we give them credit. Id let her that she is potentionally going to ruin her and her mothers life if she keeps it up. sometimes you have to approach women(even girls) through their emotions because they seldom use logic. Id make sure that you approach her with a kind gentle attitude and let her know it is hurting everyone. First and foremost is to try to be the girls friend, she might just need someone to talk to about stuff and she is resentful towards her mom because she is not "being there" for her. It is quite possible thats why she gets along with you and not her mother. She might simply just need a friend. She is at a very awkward stage in her development, being 10 sucks....Just a thought.

What in the world is this? ^^^^^^^^^^ trollspammers allready made it over here?

Im on the same page as Stormi try it and see what happens

i am with a someone that has a 5 year old boy not mine and we have a 1 1/2 year old together and i have went through and am going through the same problems right now with this boy when moms gone everything is great but when sees not he is way different we have been together since he was 2 so he does call me dad i have reached the point to where i just dont punish him no more and let mom do it all so he sees that she is not the push over he thinks she is works sometime but not always i think that kids just do it to see how far they can push u before u snap

Im in the same boat man. 6yr old boy who is great when he is alone with me. When shes around he is defiant and throws fits. He will not listen to me or her when we are both around. Hes not mine but calls me dad now. Ive been around him for 2 years. I wish I could give you some advice but I haven't found an answer for it either.

In all of your cases it sounds as if the children are attempting to get all of mom's attention, good or bad, and not share it with any of you. Mom needs to work on strengthing their relationship with the child and let them know they still come first regardless of who the man in their life is. A trip to the store, baking a cake or cookies, or playing a game of Monopoly will go along way in a child's eyes when they get to do it with mommy all by themselves. Trust Me, dealt with this with my oldest son when his mom walked out. Now going through it again with my 4 year old grandaughter that I have custody of.

What demodave said--Bottom line is mommy needs to play the large part in fixing this.

Do y'all go to church?? I'm not religious but values that instilled there boil over to home..like I said I don't have any thought of Jesus being real but I go to church with my seven year old and entertain the thoughts and practices...her mother and I aren't together but get along well and being at church Sundays does help. Kids will be kids but if its ruining your life let go. Sucks but you live life alone if cards are down..Ive seen Travis's problems first hand his are different for sure but the same in ways but girls and mom don't always click...

well guys i dont have kids and dont have these probs like you do but reading all of this it seems to me theres a treand none of the kids that are acting up are yours. mabe they are alittle jealous of you and just need some more mommy time one on one cause you say that when you r alone with them they are good right ask your wife or gfs if when they are alone with them do they act up or just bad all the time with them its just a thought mabe need just some attention from there mom alitte more to fel spiecal and not feel like there mom is givin you guys all the attention and them on the back burner but just my 2 cents

I don't totally agree with the jealousy thing..my gf has a 5year that isn't mine. His dad skipped out on him. He acts like a little butthead and I will jump his shit and he straitens right out mostly due to ?FEAR? but also respect I've never spanked him or yelled but am very addiment that he stop screwing up. My 7 year old daughter doesn't do that type stuff simply because her mother and I are somewhat close and both disciple her the same. I'm only 29 so I was young when she was born but had to start learning early..you'll figure it out its just life...and life is bumpy.

there is no such thing as bad kids ,just bad parents....could it be that these kids are someone else's and maybe you are the jealous ones,,,i know other people kids get on my nerves but my own doesn't bother me..as for the first guy.the last thing you can do is confide in another women,,you need to be talking to your wife and wife only,,,if you cant sit her down and talk to her face to face then marriage wasn't the right option to begin with,,,you got to be able to tell your spouse anything at anytime,,,crying or not,its a partnership...j,m,o

when you married mom she  became  your daughter to,,,you refer to her as her daughter ,wth????

i was a iittle crap when i was 10 also.  I think mainly it was a jealously issue for me for specific reasons. kids are kids and they arent the smartest people in the world and you need to guide them in dealing with the emotions of growing up. Kids should always come first, i can agree with what was said two posts above, to an extent. when parents go out to drink saturday and friday nights and leave this kids to baby sit after each other. or when parents get into arguments or they see tension and stress and weaknesses, what does this show the kids? kids should NOT see certain things, it messes them up.

i have been lucky to have the parents that i have, and i am just starting to notice what they did and didnt do while rasing us. mostly the good, that i never realized because i was young and dumb. hearing and seeing other parenting methods, i see alot of the bad that i didnt see growing up. for those of you that married your wife with a kid that doesnt have a dad, that is awesome, but you have to be twice the father that they dont have. they have a huge void in their brain, think about it, they dont know half of who they are.  just my two cents.